Lack of eye contact dating
If this sounds like you, then you will want to solve those other issues also.
Of all of these, arguably the most important is eye contact. Because we form connections with people through eye contact.In fact, psychologist Arthur Aaron believed you can make anyone fall in love with you by asking them 36 personal questions and then looking them deeply in the eyes for 4 minutes. Then you need to probably lots more than you do now.So if you want to have real friendships and intimacy and not just shallow small talk, then you will have to start looking people in the eyes. However, you also don’t want to creep the other person out. Everyone has a different amount they like to have and it depends on the situation.Eye Contact is a form of non-verbal communication whereby two people hold their gaze with the other person’s eyes.Eye contact is one of the most important and powerful forms of communication and is essential in almost all forms of interaction.In these situations, the more eye contact the better. You are at the bottom, and everyone who has no problem making eye contact is at the top. And this is how you’ll train yourself to be more relaxed while making more eye contact with people. If they aren’t too close, they won’t be able to tell the difference.
Of course, you shouldn’t be staring at them like a robot 100% of the time, but it’s perfectly okay to hold eye contact for 10-15 seconds or longer on a date. The scientific word for this is progressive desensitization. At first you might not even be able to look at someone’s eyes for 1 second. Make a conscious effort to do this every time you talk to someone, and slowly you’ll be able to look at their nose for longer and longer stretches of time.
The other person will feel like you’re not paying attention or you’ll seem really insecure. Too much salt and nobody will want to eat the fries either. If you give too much eye contact, people will think it’s creepy and won’t want to be around you after their first taste.
That’s why it’s important to look people in the eyes the right amount of time, not too little and not too much.
Holding eye contact for a long time like this creates a good type of tension that the other person will often feel as “butterflies” or a “romantic spark.” Please use some common sense here though. Then you will start looking into their eyes and you’ll get used to that. It will take a lot of effort in the beginning to look people in the eye. This made me seem very focused and attentive to the other person, and my conversations became much better.
Staring down a stranger on the bus is usually bad and creepy, whether you’re a man or a woman. But slowly you will get better and you will freak out less the more you practice. Sooner than you can imagine, you won’t even have to think about holding eye contact anymore.
If you continue to feel really nervous and awkward making eye contact even when you’ve tried practicing it, then the root of your problem may be deeper.